What is Family Constellation?

Family constellations is a powerful, rapidly growing method for uncovering hidden dynamics within different systems and transforming the blockages or traumas into inner resources. Also known as systemic constellations, this approach is based on the idea that every aspect of our lives operates within a system. The common examples of these systems are family, career, friendships, love relationships, and more.

At its core, family constellations suggest that many of our struggles are rooted in unresolved systemic dynamics, particularly those within our family of origin.

The Origins: Bert Hellinger’s Work

Bert Hellinger, a German psychotherapist and former Catholic priest, developed the concept of family constellations in the 1980s. His approach was influenced by systemic therapy, group dynamics, psychoanalysis, and indigenous Zulu healing rituals that he encountered while working in South Africa. Hellinger observed that families operate as an interconnected system, where unresolved past traumas, exclusions, and entanglements continue to affect future generations.

He formulated the idea that within a family system, every member—whether living or deceased—has a rightful place. When someone is forgotten or excluded, later generations unconsciously carry that burden, often experiencing emotional or physical difficulties without understanding why.

How Family Constellations Work

A family constellation session is usually conducted in a group setting or a one-on-one session with a facilitator. The process follows these steps:

1. Setting the Intention – The client states an issue they want to explore, such as relationship struggles, recurring emotional pain, or career obstacles.
2. Choosing Representatives – In a group, the client chooses other participants to represent family members or other people or subjects in their life. In an individual session, objects or figures can be used.
3. Positioning the Representatives – The facilitator guides the participant to intuitively place the representatives in a physical space. This creates a “living map” of the situation.
4. Observing Hidden Dynamics – The facilitator notices the energy, movements, and emotions of the representatives, revealing subconscious loyalties, unresolved conflicts, or any entanglements.
5. Healing & Reconciliation – The facilitator performs specific interventions such as spoken sentences,  symbolic actions, or movements of the figures. The ultimate goal is to notice the underlying dynamic and transform it into the inner resource for the client.

The Core Principles of Family Constellations

1. Belonging (The Right to a Place) – Every family member, regardless of past actions, has a right to belong. When someone is excluded (such as a lost child, a rejected ancestor, or a forgotten family member), an imbalance occurs.
2. Order (Hierarchy & Roles) – There is a natural hierarchy in a family, where earlier generations precede later ones. When roles are reversed (for example, a child emotionally “parenting” their parents), dysfunction emerges.
3. Balance of Giving and Receiving – Relationships function best when there is a fair exchange. If one person gives too much or takes too much, tension builds over time.
4. Life and death (alive are in life and dead are in death) – The living should fully embrace life. Emotionally merging with the world of the dead can create struggles for those still alive. This can happen through excessive grief or subconscious identification with someone who is not alive anymore.

The Impact of Family Constellations

Many people report profound shifts after family constellation sessions, often experiencing:

However, as deep-seated patterns emerge, some may experience temporary emotional discomfort before fully integrating the healing process. Each session is unique, and the client remains the primary guide of their inner transformation.

Family constellations can be deeply transformative and eye-opening. However, they are not a replacement for therapy but rather a complementary approach that offers insight into the unseen patterns shaping our lives.

Final Thoughts

Our lives are interwoven with the past, and sometimes, we unknowingly carry stories that aren’t ours. Family constellations help us bring these hidden dynamics to light, restore balance, and move forward with greater freedom.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in repetitive struggles or emotional weight that seems bigger than you, this method might offer the insight and transformation you need.